Ageing: it comes to us all…..

So as we enter a new month, we enter a new book of the Bible as we continue our journey with the people of Israel. 1 Kings is all about – yes, you’ve guessed it – kings. Initially, the people of Israel were led by Moses and then Joshua. Then there were a series of judges appointed by God to rule over the people and bring God’s righteousness and justice. But then the people decided they needed a king like all the other nations around them. So God relented and appointed Saul as the first king of Israel. He was followed by David.

And now this book starts with the end of David’s life and 1 and 2 Kings record the kings of Israel over the next 500 years.

Well, let’s get started…..

1 Kings 1 feels all very ‘Game of Thrones’ – full of intrigue and deceit and a very old king. It’s easy to picture the scene. David is so old that he can never get warm even when covered in blankets. His attendants find him a beautiful young girl to keep him warm – but it’s spelt out he has no sexual relations with her.

Then one of David’s sons Adonijah – the brother of Absalom, who David had a very turbulent relationship with, and who also is a very handsome man…….- takes advantage of David’s vulnerability in his very advanced years and declares himself king. Joab supports him but others, including Zadok the priest and Nathan the prophet do not. Nathan goes to Bathsheba and reminds her of God’s promise to make her son Solomon king after David. So she goes to David and says –

“My lord, you yourself swore to me your servant by the Lord your God: ‘Solomon your son shall be king after me, and he will sit on my throne.’ But now Adonijah has become king, and you, my lord the king, do not know about it. He has sacrificed great numbers of cattle, fattened calves, and sheep, and has invited all the king’s sons, Abiathar the priest and Joab the commander of the army, but he has not invited Solomon your servant. My lord the king, the eyes of all Israel are on you, to learn from you who will sit on the throne of my lord the king after him. Otherwise, as soon as my lord the king is laid to rest with his ancestors, I and my son Solomon will be treated as criminals.”  1 Kings 1:17-21

Nathan backs her up and the king is convinced. He instructs Zadok and Nathan to anoint Solomon as king. Adonijah is terrified of what Solomon will do to him and clings to the horns of the altar – but in his mercy, Solomon allows him to return home – for now.

All of this has prompted me to think about ageing. Well, actually, I’ve been thinking quite a lot recently about ageing anyway.

My Dad is a lot like David in that he can never get warm. He is always cold. Unless we have a heatwave and then he cannot stay cool. And it’s not his fault but it’s easy to get impatient when the room you are sat in is unbearably hot like a sauna and he is still saying he is cold. He has poor sight and yet is reluctant to ask for help. He cannot walk far and yet doesn’t want to appear old. Which is kind of understandable if you see ageing as a weakness, a bad thing…..which is how our society often portrays it. Old people are seen as vulnerable, not worth listening to, a burden on society……that’s why groups like the Gateshead Older People’s Assembly state this on their homepage –

With a current membership of over 2000, we speak up on behalf of ALL older people in Gateshead, we are their ‘Voice’.

Because older people are often overlooked.

Older people often feel they do not have a voice.

Older people feel they are not heard.

And whilst the physical needs of older people are more often addressed, their psychological and emotional needs can often be neglected.

That’s why organisations like Age UK are spreading the word about loneliness among older people. In June, they held a day called ‘The Big Chinwag’ encouraging people to get together and chat. We have no idea what it is to feel lonely. To witness the death of many of your friends one by one. To lose the partner that you have shared your life and home with for the past 60 years. To have no reason to go out or a physical condition that prevents you from going out. To go to the shops every day just because that is the only way you will get to speak to a real person. To have children and grandchildren who are too busy getting on with their own lives. To struggle to join in conversation because you are a bit deaf and everyone is talking too fast and not clearly enough. To never engage in a deep philosophical or political conversation with someone because they feel you are not with it or behind the times. To not be able to remember the last time someone touched you other than to examine you or see to your needs.

So Age UK Gateshead have exercise classes and walking groups, social groups, a telephone companion service, day centres, a volunteer transport service for medical appointments and a malnutrition prevention pilot.

“It’s not just about exercise, It’s about having fun, keeping fit, meeting up with friends and enjoying ourselves.
I’m not as young as I used to be, but inside I’m still the same. I want to enjoy myself with people who are like me. Laughter is the best medicine”
Margaret(76) – Gateshead Age UK

Organisations like this do a fantastic work and deserve our support. I’m delighted that Age UK Gateshead is part of our Chosen By You, Given By Us scheme in store through July and August and are coming in to fundraise on 22 August.

But of course, there is much more we can do as individuals. We can smile at an older person in the street or engage in a conversation at the bus stop. We can pop in for coffee with a neighbour or phone an older friend we haven’t seen in a while. We can offer a good service in our work with a friendly smile and helpful advice. We can treat older people with respect and attention.

We can each make someone feel special today.