Developing an attitude of gratitude #4: humility, identity and gratitude

Today we’re going to look at humility. And yes, bear with me, this does tie in with gratitude – just wait and see! This is such a difficult concept in our modern world – and even more difficult to put into practice! It’s complicated, but let’s see how we do.

Humility is not the same as humiliation. Humility is nothing to do with shame or embarrassment or insecurity. It is not about feeling worthless or degraded.

Humility comes from a place of security – of knowing that you are loved, of knowing your place in the universe, of knowing that the Creator God created you just as you are. However, humility has nothing to do with pride and entitlement and rights. It is not about taking offence over the slightest thing. It is not about imagining you deserve all that you desire.

Although, neither is humility about being a doormat. Humility is not about being a doormat, about allowing others to abuse you and treat you badly day after day. It is not about living as if you are nothing.

It is not about living as if you are everything either.

I told you it was complicated!

This is why Paul gives us such a visual explanation of humility in Philippians 2.

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.   Philippians 2:5-11

Jesus was God. Jesus is God. Jesus is an integral part of the Trinity that we call Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Jesus is equal to the Creator God in every way. He was there at the beginning of time, calling Creation into being.

And yet he chose to come to earth in human form. Why would a being who is completely divine limit themselves to human form? Worse that that, why would God make himself nothing? Why would he take on human likeness? Why would he take on the role of a servant? And why would he allow himself to be crucified at the hands of humans?

This is beyond our understanding. Jesus, who was equal in every way with God, did not use his position to avoid his calling. He did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage. Or in the version I grew up with (the RSV) – Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped… Jesus was so secure in his understanding of who he was and where he stood and his value in God that he could hold loosely to how people saw him and the things they said about him and the way they treated him. His value was not defined by other people. His value was intrinsic and could not be destroyed by anyone. (I am not condoning ongoing abuse of any kind here. There are times when it is right to stand up and say ‘I don’t deserve to be treated in this way’ and for others to stand with us in changing our story. As I said , this whole concept of humility is very, very complicated.)

What Jesus put up with in human form is based entirely on obedience and trust. He trusted God the Father to know best. He trusted God’s plan, even when it entailed suffering, even when it led to death on a cross. Jesus became ‘obedient to death’. He did not suffer because he was worthless and because he deserved it. He suffered to reconcile all of us to God, to restore our relationship with God. This is not humiliation. This is an incredible act of sacrifice that is the opposite of humiliation. It comes from a place of utmost humility, not humiliation. And so Jesus is exalted to the highest place and given the name that is above every name. He is restored to his rightful place for all the world to see exactly who he is.

So what can we learn from this? Why does Paul share this example with his readers? Well, Paul makes his motive clear – In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. How can we do that? What would that look like in practice in our everyday lives?

Well, Paul actually sets out what this humility would look like in practice in the preceding verses. However, first, let me tell you a story.

I was in a cafe on Saturday. I’d paid for coffee and cake for three people and was told I needed to get the cake off the stands myself. So I went back through the queue to get my cake. It was busy and noisy and although I said ‘Excuse me’, the lady in the queue blocking the way to the Victoria Sandwich must not have heard me. I leaned forward to reach the cake slice, leaning into her back slightly. She immediately turned on me and hissed ‘You know, if you’d said excuse me, I would have moved you know!’. I say hissed, because that’s how it sounded. It was vicious and humiliating. My cheeks burned but I stood my ground. She argued with me about whether I’d said excuse me or not. Her two boys in their football kits stood by and watched. As did everyone in the queue I imagine. I stayed calm. I went back to our table with the slices of cake and tried to put the incident behind me, but it had been so unpleasant that it was hard to do so. I imagine she was struggling to put it behind her too. She’d been so bitter and angry.

Her sense of entitlement and ‘personal space’ was so strong that she took offence at the slightest thing. And it ruined everyone’s morning.

So, back to the passage.

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. Philippians 2:1-4

One spirit, one mind, one love.

Humility starts by knowing where we stand in relation to God and in relation to others.

I am united with Christ. I am loved by the Creator of the universe. I have a unique role to play.

How incredible is that? I have so much to be thankful for!

I am special. But so are you. And you. And you.

Each one of us is equal before God. We are all in this together. Comparisons and rivalry need to give way to tenderness and compassion. We should not look down on anyone or seek to drag anyone down to our level. Jesus’ way is not self-serving, but entirely about unity, about community. About being there for others and allowing others to be there for us.

We have to start from a position of security in the God who loves us just as we are, before we venture out to face whatever the world is ready to throw at us today. That’s why I started by saying that this passage has everything to do with gratitude.

As we start each day in the presence of the one true God, quietly contemplating our identity in Him, our hearts will overflow with gratitude that He loves us and accepts us and wants us to join with Him in bringing His kingdom into the darkest places.

Thank God. Always start with that. The rest will follow.