What Jesus did #4: sometimes even he failed to impress – and that’s OK

In my experience, the hardest place to be the best version of yourself can be within your own family. I don’t think I’m alone there. It’s the people who know you best who know exactly the right buttons to press to wind you up. They’ve seen you grow and develop. They’ve seen you make mistakes and show your true colours. They can see through the bullshit – intentional or otherwise.

That’s why the celebrity figures who seem to be the most grounded are the ones who still hang out with their family and childhood friends. These people keep them real, remind them of where they’ve come from. For these people, this individual who wins awards and sings before thousands at Glastonbury and earns ridiculous amounts of money is still the girl next door, the boy from the playground, the boisterous niece or shy grandson.

The people closest to us are the ones we find hardest to impress. Others may be impressed with our wisdom and knowledge and expertise, but those who saw us growing up struggle to hear what we say at face value. It was the same for Jesus too. Why would that surprise us? He grew up as fully human. He seemed just the same as all the other kids. These people knew his family. Maybe they’d had meals round the table with Jesus – or maybe had a table in their homes that he’d made!

Jesus left there and went to his hometown, accompanied by his disciples. When the Sabbath came, he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were amazed.

“Where did this man get these things?” they asked. “What’s this wisdom that has been given him? What are these remarkable miracles he is performing? Isn’t this the carpenter? Isn’t this Mary’s son and the brother of James, Joseph, Judas and Simon? Aren’t his sisters here with us?” And they took offence at him.

Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honour except in his own town, among his relatives and in his own home.” He could not do any miracles there, except lay his hands on a few sick people and heal them. He was amazed at their lack of faith.  Mark 6:1-6 ( found in Matthew 13:53-58 too)

Sometimes he winds people up so much that they get really angry to the point of wanting to silence him. That’s some reaction!

“Truly I tell you,” he continued, “no prophet is accepted in his hometown…

All the people in the synagogue were furious when they heard this. They got up, drove him out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him off the cliff. But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way.  Luke 4:24, 28-30

So how does Jesus react to this apparent rejection and inability to take in what he has to say?

It seems to me that he simply accepts it for what it is. He acknowledges it, is amazed by it, but does nothing to counter it. He doesn’t try to persuade or convince. He doesn’t up his game and feel the need to prove himself.

And he walks away.

He recognises what is going on and simply walks away. Not in a huff or in a permanent ‘I’m never coming back here’ kind of way. Just in a simple, humble recognition that this is probably not the best place for him to be teaching and healing. There is more fertile ground out there.

I love the lesson that these passages can teach us. We have not failed we don’t manage to convince everyone. Even Jesus didn’t have a 100% success rate. The people closest to us will be the ones who find it hardest to accept anything we have to say (not that I’m saying for a moment that I have all the answers), especially if it’s seen as a criticism of how they’re currently doing things. My son’s a good example of this. Every time I try to talk to him about how things are going for him, he exclaims within minutes ‘You’re like a bloody life coach!’ I find it hard that we’ve made choices about how to live life that include a faith journey, yoga, vegetarianism, fair trade etc etc and those around us don’t really seem to embrace any of those things! I often think ‘If we’re not ‘converting’ anyone close to us to any of these things, then what are we doing wrong?’ But maybe that’s the point. Maybe those people are the least likely to respond to what we’re doing.

I cannot impose any of my convictions on anyone close to me. God knows, I’ve tried! I’m learning to hold loosely, to let those I care for find their own way (how hard is that?!?). I hope and pray that they will encounter others who will be able to influence them for good – whatever that looks like for them.

And so, for now, I continue to buy bacon for my kids and cook chicken nuggets every day for my daughter.

I allow them to make choices about what they want to watch on TV and whether they want to attend church or not.

I invite them to practise yoga with me but try not to react negatively when they refuse.

I aim for open conversation, where I don’t try to persuade but am striving to listen and understand.

All of which is stupidly tough for someone like me (who has a reputation for being a little controlling – which I don’t think I am at all!).

And sometimes you just have to walk away from an argument/heated discussion. You don’t have to be seen to be right! You don’t have to prove anything. Actually, the most important thing is actually to show grace and love in any difficult encounter…

Sometimes even Jesus failed to impress – and that’s OK.