Learning from Paul’s Letter to Philemon: a call to forgiveness

The section we’re focusing on today in Paul’s letter to Philemon could be seen as a study in how to get someone to do the right thing! We saw yesterday how Paul is sending Onesimus back to his master Philemon. Regardless of the reason that Onesimus left Philemon’s household in the first place, he belongs there as things stand at that time. Paul has helped Onesimus understand that he must go back; now he has to persuade Philemon to accept him back!

So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back—not to mention that you owe me your very self. I do wish, brother, that I may have some benefit from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in Christ. Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I ask.  Philemon 1:17-21

Paul appeals first to Philemon’s sense of loyalty. He’s asking Philemon to trust him as a close friend and partner in the kingdom of God. Welcome him as you would welcome me. Treat this young man, your runaway slave, as you would treat me, the one who introduced you to faith in Christ Jesus. And actually, that is exactly what Jesus entreated his followers to do – treat everyone as if they were Jesus himself.

Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me. Matthew 25:40 

Just imagine that world! How different our society would look right now!

God, give me those eyes right now, to see everyone as if they were Jesus himself. to see everyone as made in your divine image.

It’s significant that Paul says he is writing with his own hand. He often dictated his letters to others to write down. This one is personal. This one he wants to write down himself as he pours out his emotion into every word. This is a huge ask: expecting the master to forgive the slave, not expecting him to pay anything back. Forgiveness is always huge, isn’t it? It involves stepping down from our position of moral superiority, which is automatically humbling and can feel humiliating. We want to establish out position as the one who has been wronged, to make the other pay, to get some sort of recompense for the hurt and damage they have caused. We’re holding out for the offender to make amends. Here, Paul seems to be saying that if they come back with a clear change of heart, then that is enough to forgive and move on.

Moving on is tough too. Letting go of the hurts and the situation that caused the hurts and the person who hurt us is hard. We let it all have a hold over us, allowing what’s happened in the past to affect the present. And yet it is in the letting go that we discover a glorious freedom. When I consider forgiveness, I always think of ‘The Shack’. That book raises many great issues, but for me, the overarching theme is forgiveness. If Mac can find it in his heart to forgive, then so can I.

And it’s the same here. If Philemon can find it in his heart to forgive, then so can I.

This is why this letter is included in the Bible, I believe. It is a specific issue between two specific men, but it is a clear example of a universal truth: a truth that every single follower of Christ needs to work through in their own lives, because at some point, we will all be wronged and called upon to forgive. That is the nature of life.

This act of reconciliation between these two men of hugely different standing in society does not only affect these two men. As we observe any act of reconciliation, it affects us too. Reconciliation warms our hearts (just think of all those uplifting videos of reconciliation on your Facebook feed and how they make you feel). There’s something within us that yearns for it – for ourselves, for those around us, for the whole of Creation. I believe that is God within us, the God who is reconciling all things and all people to Himself. This is the forward thrust of the universe. Each act of reconciliation refreshes our hearts in Christ, as Paul says.

Paul is placing his faith in this man to do the right thing. As we saw yesterday, Paul cannot control the outcome of this encounter, but he knows Philemon and based on that knowledge, he is confident that he can find it in his heart to forgive. I would like to be known as that person too. I would like others who know me to believe that I am capable of such a massive act of forgiveness. The work starts long before the individual is called upon to forgive. It’s about cultivating the right attitude to others and therefore earning a reputation for love and respect right here, right now.

Let’s start preparing our hearts today to be forgiving hearts when the occasion arises.