Maybe there’s something in here to help us face the death of a loved one…

Jesus knows exactly who he is and exactly what he has been sent to earth by God to do.

He knows how he is to live, but also how he is to die.

He knows that his death is to be as significant as his life.

The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.

Now my soul is troubled, and what shall I say? ‘Father, save me from this hour’? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour. Father, glorify your name!”

Then a voice came from heaven, “I have glorified it, and will glorify it again.” The crowd that was there and heard it said it had thundered; others said an angel had spoken to him.  John 12: 23-24, 27-29

It is through Jesus’ death that God is to be glorified. It is for this very reason that Jesus came.

He knows it’s not going to be an easy path. He’s going to have to draw on all his trust and obedience and courage to walk this path of suffering ahead of him. This is God’s way, whether Jesus likes it or wants it or understands it.

However, Jesus knows that his followers are going to struggle to understand. He tries to prepare them for what is to come.

Jesus took the Twelve aside and told them, “We are going up to Jerusalem, and everything that is written by the prophets about the Son of Man will be fulfilled. He will be delivered over to the Gentiles. They will mock him, insult him and spit on him; they will flog him and kill him. On the third day he will rise again.”

The disciples did not understand any of this. Its meaning was hidden from them, and they did not know what he was talking about.  Luke 18: 31-34

A similar conversation is found in Matthew 20, Mark 10 and Luke 9.

It’s hard for us to understand how Jesus’ followers would have felt. This was the Messiah, the one they had been waiting for. This was the man sent by God to deliver them from their oppressors. This Jesus had been performing miraculous signs and announcing the coming of a new kingdom. It was all exciting and revolutionary and packed with hope and positivity.

What he was describing here was beyond their comprehension.

How was it possible that Jesus was going to be mocked and insulted and spat on and flogged and killed? That wasn’t part of the plan. He couldn’t leave them. He was only just getting started. This made no sense at all!

Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. “Never, Lord!” he said. “This shall never happen to you!”

Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”  Matthew 16: 22-23

Peter’s reaction is understandable.

I don’t want this to happen. I can’t accept this is going to happen, so I’ll make sure it doesn’t. I’ll do everything in my power to fix this. 

This is an entirely human response. We want to hang on to the people we love. We want our special people to be with us forever. We’re not prepared to accept that God may have a different plan. We don’t see the bigger picture, but God does.

It’s perfectly natural to feel this way. Losing someone we love is unbearably painful. Life will never be the same again without them. We want to do everything we can to avoid having to face this awful, gaping whole.

However, we do have to recognise that whilst this is entirely human, it is not the way God operates. God’s thinking is not the same as the world’s thinking. He has an understanding of the whole of eternity that transcends the human imagination. In comparison, out thinking is small – not insignificant because dealing with the death of a loved one is hugely significant in our own experience, but it is focused on ourselves and how we feel and respond and in the grand scheme of things, that is a tiny part of what’s going on across the whole universe.

Look at the death and resurrection of Jesus. With the benefit of hindsight, we can see how hugely significant these events were in transforming the whole of human history and restoring relationship with God on a whole new spiritual level. But for these individuals, on a personal level, they were facing the loss of their friend and teacher – the most incredible human being they had ever encountered. They weren’t ready to let him go.

My soul is troubled.

Jesus said that. Jesus knew the devastating disruption that death creates. Jesus wept when his friend Lazarus died.

Death is awful. We’re never ready to let go of the one we love.

Jesus isn’t saying we should deny our emotions and hide how we feel. But when Jesus rebukes Peter, he’s saying ‘Try to see this from God’s perspective and not your own. Let go of the the way the world thinks and embrace God’s way of thinking.’

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Romans 12:2

And maybe, just maybe, we will find some comfort and healing in glimpsing God’s way.