When kindness is rejected…..

We see David again showing kindness in the very next chapter – 2 Samuel 10.

Well trying to, anyway.

In the course of time, the king of the Ammonites died, and his son Hanun succeeded him as king. David thought, “I will show kindness to Hanun son of Nahash, just as his father showed kindness to me.” So David sent a delegation to express his sympathy to Hanun concerning his father.  2 Samuel 10:1-2

That’s kind, isn’t it? Sending condolences to a potential rival. David knows what it is to grieve. He feels empathy for Hanun.

Unfortunately Hanun’s men treat David’s kindness with suspicion –

“Do you think David is honoring your father by sending envoys to you to express sympathy? Hasn’t David sent them to you only to explore the city and spy it out and overthrow it?”  2 Samuel 10:3

Sometimes when people are unexpectedly kind, we do find ourselves questioning their motives, don’t we? We find it hard to accept their kindness, to take it at face value.

So David’s kindness is rejected in quite a dramatic manner –

So Hanun seized David’s envoys, shaved off half of each man’s beard, cut off their garments at the buttocks, and sent them away.  2 Samuel 10:4

What a picture! David does what he can to protect his men from humiliation.

And Hanun and the Ammonites realise their mistake. This isn’t going to end well for them, is it?

When two tribes go to war……

Joab and David’s army are surrounded – with the Ammonites on one side and the hired Aramean soldiers on the other. But Joab trusts and obeys the living God –

Be strong, and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight.  2 Samuel 10:12

And the victory is theirs.

All because one man could not accept another man’s kindness.

I’m not suggesting this passage is condoning getting even when our kindness is rejected. This is God working in a particular context and it is not always this way – look how Jesus did not retaliate when he was treated so badly and humiliated publicly before his death.

I’m just raising the point that sometimes our kindness will be rejected – but that should not stop us trying.

How hard is it to show kindness to those who blank you in the street every day?

How hard is it to show kindness to those who twist everything you say?

How hard is it to show kindness to those who spread rumours about you behind your back?

How hard is it to show kindness to those who never ever say thank you?

How hard is it to show kindness to those who throw it back in your face?

It all comes down to being the better person again, doesn’t it?

Keep smiling. Keep encouraging. Keep helping.

Some people have good reason to distrust kindness. Maybe it has been misused in the past. Maybe they have not experienced much kindness in their life at all. Maybe kindness makes them feel vulnerable and they react with spite to protect themselves from hurt.

But there is no doubt about it – deliberate acts of kindness make the world a better place for all of us so I don’t intend to give up any time soon……